10 Things You Should Not Say to Your Child as Volleyball Parents Before a Match
Practice like you’ve never won, play like you’ve never lost
Michael Jordan
Source: Strength and Power Volleyball.
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What are the things you should not say to your child as volleyball parents before a match?
How each one of these unhelpful statements that you say to your child will impact their confidence /performance on the court and the things to focus on instead?
If you want answers for these questions, you are in the right place!
The time before a volleyball match is pretty crucial for both parents and players. The things you say to your child has the power to influence them in many ways throughout the match.
In this post, I’ll tell you all about the 10 things you should not say to your child as volleyball parents before a match.
Let’s get started!
Did you know? Focusing too much on winning can hinder a child’s long-term performance. Studies show that children who feel supported and not pressured to win tend to stay motivated and perform better overall as a player.
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Things You Should Not Say to Your Child as Volleyball Parents Before a Match
You Have to Win Today/Winning is the Only Thing That Matters
Telling your child that they ‘must win’ or that winning is all that matters puts an immense amount of pressure on them. Volleyball is about more than just the final score.
It’s about learning teamwork, improving skills and having fun.
When the focus is solely on winning, it can lead to anxiety, frustration and fear of failure. Instead, encourage your child to do their best, emphasizing effort and growth over outcomes.
This way, they’ll enjoy the game and continue to develop both as players and as individuals.
Don’t Let the Team Down and They are Counting on You
When you say to your child that the team’s success rests solely on their shoulders, it can create unnecessary tension and stress. Volleyball is a team sport, and everyone plays a role in the outcome of a match.
Statements such as these will make a child feel like they’re personally responsible for any mistakes or losses, which can damage their confidence. Rather, remind them that the best teams work together and that their effort, no matter the outcome, is valuable.
Emphasize the importance of supporting teammates, doing their best and enjoying the experience, rather than fearing they’ll disappoint others.
You Got to Play Perfectly Today
Expecting perfection from your child before a match sets unrealistic standards that can lead to frustration and fear of making mistakes. No athlete, no matter how skilled, won’t play flawlessly every single game.
Volleyball is a fast-paced sport where mistakes are inevitable and part of learning. Saying to your child that they must play perfectly can make them overthink every move, causing hesitation and lowering their confidence.
Alternately, remind them that effort, improvement and resilience are what truly counts. Encourage them to play their best and embrace mistakes as learning opportunities, which will help them grow as a player.
If You Lose, We’re Going to Be Disappointed
Telling your child that you’ll be disappointed if they lose puts unnecessary emotional pressure on them and can negatively affect their self-esteem. Volleyball, like any other sport, is unpredictable and losing is part of it.
When a child feels that their worth is tied to winning, they might become anxious and lose confidence in their abilities. Instead, focus on supporting their effort and growth, regardless of the result.
Let them know that what matters most to you is their hard work, sportsmanship and love for volleyball, not the final score.
This helps foster a healthy relationship with competition.
Must’ve Gear for Volleyball Players
Don’t Make Any Unnecessary Mistakes
Saying not to make any unnecessary mistakes to your child will make them overly cautious and afraid to take risks during the match. Volleyball is a dynamic sport where mistakes are part of the process, and trying to play error-free can actually hinder performance.
Instead of focusing on avoiding mistakes, encourage your child to play confidently, knowing that making errors is a natural part of learning and improving in the sport.
Remind them that what matters most is their effort and how they respond to challenges, not perfection. This mindset will help them grow as a player and enjoy the game more.
Do You Remember How You Played Last Time?
Bringing up a past performance, especially if it wasn’t great, can add unnecessary pressure on your child before the match. It forces them not to focus on the present moment and allows dwelling on past mistakes.
Every game is a new opportunity, and constantly reminding them of previous games can negatively affect their confidence. Encourage them to focus on what they’ve learned and how they can enjoy the match today.
Help them approach each match with a positive mindset. Also make them understand that improvement in volleyball comes with time, not from dwelling on the past errors.
You are the Best Player, Act Like It
If there’s one statement that spells doom to the interest of your child in volleyball, this is the perfect one! Telling your child that they’re the best player in the team and expecting them to ‘act like it’ can add unwanted pressure and set overwhelming expectations.
It’ll also create tension with teammates, leading your child to feel isolated or overly burdened by the responsibility to perform at a certain level. Instead of emphasizing superiority, remind them that volleyball is a team sport and success comes from working together.
Encourage effort, teamwork and a positive attitude. Let your child focus on doing their best without feeling the need to prove something to others.
Everyone’s rooting for You to Do Well
While it’s meant to be encouraging, letting your child know that ‘everyone’s rooting for you to do well’ will actually be an added pressure. It may make them feel like they must meet the expectations of everyone watching.
This leads to anxiety and self-doubt.
Rather than emphasizing external expectations, remind your child that their personal effort and growth are what matters the most. Make them understand that you support them regardless of the outcome and that the match should be fun and a chance to learn new things.
This approach will help your child to feel less burdened and more confident in their abilities.
You Shouldn’t Lose to That Team/You Need to Win This Match
Saying things like ‘you shouldn’t lose to that team’ or you need to win this match’ won’t allow your child to make bold plays on the court. It shifts the focus from personal growth and teamwork to results and judgment.
Every team and match present their own challenges, and placing undue emphasis on winning can make your child feel anxious, fearing failure if they don’t meet expectations.
Instead of framing the match as a must-win, encourage them to play their best, regardless of the opponent. Remind them that each game is a learning opportunity, win or lose and that their effort and performance is more important than the final score.
Don’t Embarrass Us/Yourself Out There
Telling your child not to embarrass themselves or you during a match can severely damage their overall confidence. It suggests that their value is tied to their performance and that mistakes are shameful, rather than part of the learning process.
Volleyball, like any sport, is filled with highs and lows, and mistakes are natural. Statements like this can make your child feel self-conscious and afraid to take risks, which are essential for growth. Alternatively, remind them that you’re proud of them no matter what and that the focus should be on enjoying this opportunity to play in the team and giving their best effort on the court.
Encouraging a positive mindset helps your child to enjoy the game and build resilience towards successfully tackling any situation of a match.
FAQs on Things You Should Not Say to Your Child as Volleyball Parents Before a Match
Why is it Important Not to Focus Solely on Winning?
As I said earlier, focusing only on winning can create unnecessary pressure, emotional burden and stress for your child. It’s essential to emphasize effort, growth and enjoyment of the game, which helps them develop resilience and a positive mindset as a player.
How can You Encourage Your Child Without Adding Extra Pressure on Them?
Encourage your child by highlighting their effort, teamwork and progress in playing volleyball. Remind them that mistakes are part of the learning process, and success comes from giving their best on the court, not from being a perfect player.
What Should You Say to Help Your Child Feel Confident Before a Match?
Rather than focusing on results, remind your child to have fun, do their best and enjoy the experience of playing volleyball. Let them know that you are proud of them regardless of the outcome of the match.
Conclusion
I’ll say it again and again that volleyball is such an emotions oriented sport. Your unsupportive statements as volleyball parents will weigh heavily on your child’s mind throughout the match.
I am pretty hopeful that this post on 10 things you should not say to your child as volleyball parents before a match will be useful to you.
What are your thoughts about this list?
Would you like to add any other statement?
Share them in the comments section below!
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Very interesting. Growing up my dad was old school but he never belittled us but if we were slacking off I could feel his glare from across the room! I still don’t know how he could get us moving without saying a word! I am very glad it was just a glare and not like some of the other parents.
Hi Jarrod, actually that’s a pretty good thing that your father did! Glare doesn’t hurt at all like a sharp, unhelpful comment from your parent.
Parents definitely need to be aware of what they say to their kids when it comes to sports. These are good points.
Hi Marysa, thanks for your encouraging comment. Glad you found these points helpful. I totally agree that what parents say to their child before a match is pretty important.
You do need to be careful what you say before a match. Negativity can greatly affect a child’s confidence and how they play.
Hi Melanie E, I completely agree with your points!
Words of wisdom. Time before a volleyball match is very crucial for both parents and players.
Hi Indu, yes! It is super important.
It must be so tough to know what to say that’s motivational and inspiring enough without putting too much pressure. Good list of things not to say x
Hi Rhian Scammell, thanks for your commen. Glad to know that you found this post helpful.
My granddaughter does Karate, but is not playing matches yet. I do think it’s very important to let your kids have fun, rather than win
Hi Renata Feyen, I completely agree with you! Wonderful point of view!
I am sharing this with my mom and we will keep this in our mind. My sister is playing volleyball.
Hi marie Cris Angeles, thanks a lot. Glad to know that your sister is playing volleyball. Convey my best wishes to her!
This is such helpful advice. I think it can be easy for parents to think they’re helping when they’re really not! Very helpful tips for parents!
Hi Lisa, thanks for your insightful comment. Glad to know that you found this post helpful.
Every parent needs to read this. Whether your child plays volleyball, football, or any sport, these all apply. It’s vital to be supportive without adding pressure.
Hi Claudia, thanks a million for your encouraging words, and I wholehearttedly agree with you!
Such great advice, I have always tried to let my kids know that it was just one game and find positives from previous games
Hi Samantha Donnelly, thanks for your comment. It’s an awesome method for not putting unnecessary pressure on our kids in my opinion!
Awesome reminders to any parent, grown-up and any sport. Incredibly useful post.
Hi Celebrate Woman Today, thank you so very much!
My children don’t play volleyball, but I still found this post really helpful for the sports that they play and the principles definitely extend to many different kinds of sports and other activities too. Thank you for the guidance on what not to say!
Hi Andrea, thanks for your encouraging comment. Glad you found this post helpful and relatable.
I love the reminder to focus on effort and growth rather than just winning. These tips are going to help me support my child better before matches!
Hi Lavanda Michelle, thanks for your comment. Glad you found this post relatable.
As a parent it is all about encouraging words and good vibes and giving support. You have to tell them how proud you are no matter what.
Hi Yeah Lifestyle, thanks for your comment. I totally agree with your points!
Words can be really meaningful for children. Thank you for highlighting what NOT to say to them.
Hi Jupiter Hadley, thanks for your comment. What you say to your child before the match will surely mean a lot to them, so saying the right thing is critical. Glad you found this post helpful.
These are great tips for parents with kids in any sport! It is good to highlight their progress and just do their best!
Hi Heather, thanks for your comment. I completely agree! Glad to know that you found this post helpful for volleyball parents and all other sports parents as well.
This is some great advice. It is so important to encourage kids and not put pressure on them to win.
Hi Ella English, thanks for your comment. Glad you found this post helpful for volleyball parents. I completely agree with your points!
Useful points to consider. Unsupportive statements as volleyball parents will weigh heavily on your child’s mind during the match.
Hi Indu, thanks for your comment. I totally agree with you!
These apply to kids in all sports. The most important thing is to do your best and have fun.
Hi Tania M, thanks for your comment. Glad you found this post applicable for all sports parents, and I totally agree with your point on letting kids enjoy the sport that they play and having fun!
I can’t believe some parents would say any of these to their kids….”Don’t Embarrass Us/Yourself Out There” They’re all bad and negative but to me this is the worst.
Hi Karen, thanks for your comment. Unfortunately, it happens sometimes. Glad to know that you found this post helpful for volleyball parents.
These posts are so interesting especially since I don’t know much about volleyball. Great instructions too we could use all the time with our kids.
Hi Tammy, thanks for your comment. Very glad to know that you found this post interesting to read.
This is such great advice. Most of these seem like no-brainers, but it’s actually very easy to accidentally put extra pressure on your kids when you’re trying to encourage them.
Hi Beth, thanks a lot for your thoughtful comment. Glad to know that you found this post helpful for volleyball parents.