My Son/Daughter Didn’t Make The Volleyball Team: What to Do Now?

You cannot turn your winning attitude on when you think you ‘need it.’ You must work on it every day, every practice, every match – win or lose. Focus on playing to win, not playing to lose, for there is a season of difference between the two.

John Kessel

Source: Volleyball Expert.

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As volleyball parents, you may have to ponder with these questions at some point in your child’s volleyball journey.

My son/daughter didn’t make the volleyball team: What to do Now?

What are the things I need to do to keep them moving in the right track?

Come along till the end to know all the details!

There’s no doubt that your child not making the volleyball team is a challenging emotion to deal with.

To make your job a little easier, I’ve put together a detailed guide that talks about how to deal with your child not making the volleyball team and the things you need to do to keep them moving in the right direction.

Let’s get started. Shall we?

Did you know that team selection can sometimes be influenced by roster balance, position needs and team composition, not just individual performance? A player may miss out simply because a team is already full.

Tips on What to Do If Your Son/Daughter Didn’t Make The Volleyball Team

Understanding Your Child’s Emotions After Not Making the Team

Not making the volleyball team can feel like a major disappointment for your child, especially if they were excited, worked hard and believed that they had a real chance of making the roster. In many cases, this experience may trigger emotions such as sadness, frustration, embarrassment, self-doubt or even anger.

As a parent, it is important to recognize that your child may not immediately know how to process these feelings. Some children openly express disappointment, while others may become quiet, withdrawn or pretend that the outcome does not bother them.

Giving them space to feel their emotions without judgment can make a big difference during this time.

Avoid minimizing their disappointment by saying things like ‘It’s not a big deal’ or ‘Just move on’. While these comments may be well-intentioned, they may make your child feel misunderstood.

What you can do instead is to acknowledge their emotions and let them know it is completely normal to feel upset after experiencing a setback.

This can also be a valuable moment to teach emotional awareness and resilience. Encourage your child to talk about how they feel and remind them that one tryout result does not define their abilities, potential or future in volleyball.

Helping your child understand and process their emotions first creates a stronger foundation for growth, reflection and a healthier mindset moving forward.

Helping Your Child to Understand What Coaches Look for During Volleyball Tryouts

Not making the team can leave your child feeling confused, especially if they are unsure why they were not selected. This is a good opportunity to help them better understand that volleyball coaches evaluate players based on much more than just effort or enthusiasm.

During tryouts, coaches often look for a combination of technical skills, athletic ability, coachability, attitude, communication and overall match awareness.

While skills such as passing, serving, setting, hitting, blocking and lateral movement are important, coaches also pay close attention to how players respond to instructions, handle mistakes and interact with teammates.

Help your child understand that team selection is often competitive and influenced by several factors, including roster size, team needs, player positions and the overall skill level of other athletes attending the tryout. In some cases, a player may perform well but still not be selected simply because there were limited spots available.

Encourage your child to view this experience as a learning opportunity rather than a personal failure. Understanding what coaches prioritize can help them approach future tryouts with clearer expectations and a stronger sense of purpose.

This conversation can also motivate your child to focus on specific areas of improvement and develop habits that coaches value, both on and off the court. The more they understand the evaluation process, the better prepared they will be for future tryouts.

How to Talk to Your Child in a Supportive and Positive Way

The way you speak to your child after they do not make the volleyball team can have a lasting impact on how they process the experience. In moments like this, your role is not to immediately fix the disappointment, but to offer reassurance, understanding and emotional support.

Start by listening more than you speak. Give your child space to express how they feel without interrupting, judging or rushing to offer solutions.

Sometimes, they simply need to feel heard and understood before they are ready to move forward.

Use encouraging language that validates their emotions while keeping the situation in perspective. Let them know that feeling disappointed is normal and that setbacks are a natural part of sports and personal growth.

Remind them that one tryout result does not define their value, talent or future potential as a volleyball player.

Avoid overly critical comments or immediately pointing out what they did wrong. This will make your child feel even more discouraged during an already emotional time.

Instead, focus on effort, attitude and what can be learned from the experience.

You can also ask thoughtful questions such as what they felt went well during tryouts, what challenged them and what they would like to improve before the next tryout session.

A calm, positive conversation can help your child feel supported, maintain confidence and develop a healthier mindset toward setbacks, competition and long-term improvement in volleyball.

Helping Your Child Handle Disappointment and Build Resilience

Disappointment is an unavoidable part of sports, and not making the volleyball team can be one of the first major setbacks your child experiences as an athlete. While the situation may feel discouraging in the moment, it can also become an important opportunity for personal growth and emotional development.

Help your child understand that setbacks are not roadblocks, but learning experiences that will strengthen their mindset over time. Remind them that many successful athletes have faced rejection, missed valuable opportunities and disappointment before reaching their goals.

Encourage your child to focus on what they can control moving forward. This may include improving specific volleyball skills, building physical fitness, strengthening mental toughness or approaching future tryouts with better preparation and confidence.

It is also helpful to model resilience through your own attitude. If you remain calm, optimistic and solution-focused, your child is more likely to adopt a similar perspective.

Avoid dwelling on blame, frustration or unfairness, as this can keep them emotionally stuck in the setback.

Instead of that, the best thing you can do is to guide your child toward reflection by discussing what they learned from the experience and how they can use that knowledge to grow. Celebrate their willingness to try, compete and put themselves in a challenging situation.

Learning how to handle disappointment in a healthy way helps your child develop resilience not only for volleyball, but also for future challenges in various aspects.

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Identifying Areas for Improvement in Their Overall Game

Not making the volleyball team can provide valuable insight into areas where your child may need to improve further. While the outcome will feel disappointing, it can also serve as motivation to take a closer look at their current skill level and overall readiness for future tryouts.

Encourage your child to honestly reflect on their performance during tryouts. Were there certain drills, skills or match situations where they felt less confident?

Identifying these moments will help highlight areas that may need more focused practice and attention.

Improvement is often not limited to technical skills alone. In addition to serving, passing, setting, hitting, blocking and defensive movements, your child will also benefit from improving physical conditioning, speed, agility, endurance, communication and overall court awareness.

If possible, consider seeking constructive feedback from coaches after tryouts. Their observations will provide clearer direction on what your child should prioritize before the next tryout.

Even a small piece of feedback will help create a more intentional training plan.

Help your child understand that improvement is a process built through consistency, patience and willingness to learn. Rather than viewing weaknesses as permanent limitations, encourage them to see these areas as opportunities for growth.

A focused approach to improvement can help your child return stronger, more confident and better prepared for future volleyball tryouts.

Explaining How to Turn Setbacks Into Lessons for Future Tryouts

Not making the team does not have to be the end of your child’s journey in volleyball. In many cases, experiences like this can become valuable lessons that better prepare them for future tryouts.

Help your child understand that every tryout offers insight, regardless of the outcome. Encourage them to reflect on what they learned from the experience, including what went well, what felt challenging and what they would approach differently next time.

This reflection can help your child become more self-aware as an athlete. They may recognize areas where they need stronger technical skills, better conditioning, improved confidence in terms of execution or more preparation before entering another competitive tryout session.

It is also important to remind your child that progress in volleyball is rarely linear. Growth often comes through setbacks, adjustments and repeated effort over time.

A disappointing result today can motivate stronger habits and better preparation for future tryouts.

Encourage your child to set realistic short-term goals based on what they learned. These goals might include improving serving consistency, strengthening passing technique, increasing endurance and gaining more match experience.

Based on these, encourage them to set long-term goals as well.

By viewing setbacks as learning opportunities instead of personal failures, your child can develop a healthier mindset toward competition and improvement. This perspective helps them approach future tryouts with more confidence, maturity and readiness to perform at their best.

Exploring Alternative Opportunities to Keep Playing Volleyball Until the Next Tryout

Not making the team doesn’t mean your child has to step away from volleyball. In fact, this can be an excellent time to explore other opportunities that allow them to continue developing their skills, gaining experience and staying connected to the sport.

Encourage your child to look into alternative ways to keep playing volleyball until the next tryout. This may include joining recreational leagues, local volleyball clubs, community training programs, open gyms, private lessons or skill development camps.

These opportunities will provide valuable court time while helping your child strengthen both technical skills and match confidence. Regular play also allows them to stay active, improve conditioning and gain more experience in different competitive environments.

If formal programs are not immediately available, your child can still make progress through consistent individual practice. Working on serving, passing, footwork, ball control, strength and agility will make a meaningful difference over time.

Keeping your child involved in volleyball also helps maintain motivation after disappointment. Rather than focusing only on what did not happen, they can shift their attention toward growth, preparation and long-term improvement.

Remind your child that one team decision does not determine their future in volleyball. Staying engaged with the sport allows them to keep building skills, confidence and experience while preparing for the next opportunity to tryout again with a stronger mindset.

FAQs on What to Do If Your Son/Daughter Didn’t Make The Volleyball Team

Should You Ask the Coach Why Your Child did not Make the Volleyball Team?

Yes, politely asking for feedback will be helpful. Coaches may provide insight into areas your child needs to improve, such as skills, fitness and match-awareness.

Constructive feedback will help your child prepare more effectively for future tryouts.

How can You Help Your Child Stay Motivated After Not Making the Team?

Encourage them to focus on improvement rather than disappointment. Setting small goals, practicing consistently, attending camps or clinics and continuing to play in other volleyball settings will help rebuild confidence and maintain motivation.

Can Your Child Still Become a Good Volleyball Player After Not Making a Team?

Absolutely. Many athletes experience setbacks before reaching their goals.

Not making a team will highlight areas for growth and motivate better preparation, stronger habits and greater resilience for future opportunities in volleyball.

Conclusion

When your son/daughter puts in a lot of effort to master the skills and tryout for volleyball, it is difficult to come to terms with they not making the team.

But I am sure that the tips in this guide will be pretty useful for you to deal with your son/daughter not making the team efficiently as volleyball parents.

What are your thoughts about this guide?

Would you like to add any tips that helped you deal with your son/daughter not making the volleyball team?

Kindly share them away in the comments section below!

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